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I am a stay at home mom who finds little snippets of time to craft and create.
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Sunday, September 26, 2010

Tayrien Mark Hamman



He is here! He finally has arrived into this world! September 23 at 4 am I woke to shower and get ready. I picked through a few outfits before settling on a favorite black shirt and jean capris. I was told not to wear makup, so I just did my hair and gathered the last few remaining things for my bag. My mother came at 4:40 to stay with Benjamin until the surgery at 7. Daniel and I drove the sleepy road to to the hospital, which is literally two minutes away. We arrived at the hospital and made our way to the third floor. I had been here many times this pregnancy with preterm labor, but today they were not going to give me a shot and send me home. They were ready for me.
They placed me in the same labor and delivery room as I was in when I had Benjamin two years ago. I met my nurse Donna, whom I was very happy to have. She had been there for my preterm a few weeks ago and I liked her a lot. She would take care of the baby when he came. I was prepped with an I.V. and gown and was hooked up to monitors until the they were ready for us. I felt this little tiny fear in the back of my head pop in every once and a while. I was not looking forward to them cutting me open. I remember it being very painful the day afterward. I had my phone and was listening to the radio when a particular song cam on. It is "Stolen" by Dashboard Confessionals. I placed the phone on my tummy and had a little moment with my unborn baby. This is our little theme song. I got very excited after this to meet him. My doctor came in as well as the anesthesiologist to prep me. When it came time I walked back to the operating room and climbed up onto a skinny table. The anesthesiologist talked me through the steps he was doing and my spinal was done in a few minutes. I laid down after my bum started to get warm and fuzzy. There were people buzzing around me, asking questions and I would answer. Someone laid a warm blanket over my shoulders. I love this part of surgery. Warmed blankets! I need a device that does this in my house. Soon the drape went up so I could no longer see my engorged baby belly. Something cold was wiped across the incision area. I could hear my doctor and then someone said to go get Daniel. He was in the room and sitting to my side. He found my hand under the blankets and I was grateful he was there. I was getting nervous. There was a student nurse in the room, so my doctor was giving a play-by-play so it was nice to hear exactly what he is doing. I am trying to concentrate, but find my self so tired. I remembering being this way last time too. They doctor said I didn't have very much scar tissue. All of a sudden I hear, "Do you see the shape of his head? There is a hand too." I knew we were just seconds away from the delivery. They made their last incision and pulled the baby out. It took a few seconds, but a low cry came out of my little boy. I started to cry. I was so touched and grateful that he was finally here. Daniel stood up to watch them and I could tell he was so happy. He turns to me and says,"If you can't tell, I'm smiling!" Daniel is just so cute. He runs to the baby. Everyone says that he has lots of hair and is gorgeous! He was born at 7:35am, weighed 6lbs 15.8oz, and measured 20 in. long.
Daniel returns in a few minutes and says they are bringing him so I can see. The nurse sets him next to my head and I reach up and hold him. I start to cry again and am in love with him. I didn't want to touch Ben when he came out, because I have this thing with bodily juices, but this time I would have kissed every inch of him. They soon pull away and Daniel, the nurse and the baby wen to the nursery. The anesthesiologist would keep asking if I was ok and tell me what was left to do. He was a very kind man and very concerned about me. I felt nauseated and he held a lima bean shaped bowl so I could throw up. Then laid a wash cloth on my forehead. My doctor was still telling the step-by-step process and I learned that some doctors only do one layer of stitching and it makes it messy, but my doctor puts in at least three before the outside staples. That way I heal faster and cleaner. He is a very good and meticulous doctor. He then ended by talking about having to do surgery with very simple tools in Vietnam. He said he was there for 13 months, 3 weeks, 6 days, _hours and _minutes. I don't remember all the details, but he did not enjoy his experiences there and it is forever in his mind. When I was finished they took down the drape and prepared me for the bed. The doctor said I was a good patient and the baby is beautiful. They wheeled me back to the room and I was monitored for a while before Daniel wheeled the baby to my side. He said he had trouble maintaining his body temp, so it took them a while to bring him back. I held him and they laid another warm blanket over us to keep him warm. He was beautiful. He had long black hair and plump lips. He looked like Ben, but a little different. His head shape was thinner. I nursed him and he was a great eater. No problem latching and he was hungry. They said he kept sucking his fist, so they gave him a pacifier to soothe him until he could come to me. Daniel said he had taken Ben to see the baby through the glass window and he acted shy and would whisper baby.
After a while family came back into the room to hold him. Grandpa Mark went first followed my Grandma Dee and Gram Guenin. Ben had his chance too. He was very careful and all smiles. He loved to kiss and hug his little brother. Soon everyone left and we made our way to the room we would stay in for the next few days. Daniel and I slept a lot the rest of the day and cuddled the baby. Grandpa Mark came back after work and held him for two hours. His eyes were open and he loved to be held. That night the baby would sleep for four hour stretches and then eat really well.
The next day Ben stays with my mom and they visit the zoo. Daniel and I spend time with the baby. Friends visit periodically and bring wonderful gifts. Daniel leaves for a while to run some errands and comes back with gifts. I get lots of chocolate and the baby gets elephant themed gifts. Later on Daniel's sister Michelle and her family visit us. His parents come too. We spend time analyzing the baby and visiting. Daniel is so cute with the baby. He runs to his aid at a moments whimper. He talks and cuddles with him. You can tell how proud he is of him and the love just emanates. I am happy with this beautiful sight. He is such a good daddy.
The next day Doctor Zeller comes and takes out my stapels. He asks if I want to go home and lets me. We prepare to go home and Daniel fills my prescription for pain medication. My mom, brother Joe and Ben all come to help. We load everything up and drive home. Benny has to pull this toy attached to the baby's car seat that vibrates for him the whole way home. If he lets go accidentally, he says "reach" until Daniel helps it find it's way back into Ben's hands. When we arrive home there is a cute sign Ben made to welcome his little brother home on the front door. There are balloons signs and decorations up all over the living room that Gram, Joe and Ben put up for our welcome home. It is a beautiful sight. Soon the house is all settled and we all take a nap together. Ben visits Grandpa and Grandma Hamman's house and Daniel and I spend time settling with the baby. We watch woman's conference on the t.v. and soon Ben is home. Things are finally starting to fall into their new places. It seems like he has always been apart of our family and couldn't imagine anything different. Ben always want to hold the baby. When he gives kisses it isn't just one, it is like a shower of kisses. We have our moments of difficulty with a two year old and the new things in our lives, but I know they will sort themselves out and our lives will be better than before, because we have a new person apart of our family. We love him to death.

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Final chapter

This is the very last day. The final chapter in this pregnancy number 2. It has been very different than my first time around.

I was very ill at the beginning. So ill in fact I spent two months lying on the couch unable to move or sit up. It was very hard to take care of Benjamin. My selfless mother was with me every day during this hard time. It made me so sad to have to let someone change Benny's diapers and feed him for me. I felt so helpless. With Ben's pregnancy I threw up a lot, but this time the nausea feeling never went away for those two months. I have a really hard time accepting help from people. I think it is the way I was brought up. Independent, strong women raised me and I kind of took on that mentality.

When I was finally able to walk and take care of myself as well as my child I felt so much better. I had all this energy and I loved food! I felt like a totally different person so I took advantage of this and accomplished a lot during these few short months.

I am unusual in that I experience contractions practically the whole pregnancy. I started them even earlier this go around at 10 weeks. Toward the end of the pregnancy things started to get way more intense. The contractions were really painful, like labor and delivery painful. Around 33 weeks was my first of many trips to the OB floor for preterm labor. They gave me a shot to stop contractions and sent me on my way telling me to take it easy. I did a little, but it is really hard with a two year old. Three weeks later I was in again and put on bed rest. Daniel moved the bed into the living room and my mom practically lived with us again. I don't know what I would have done without her! My mother in law came one day and was such a great help. The outpouring of generosity from friends has been enormous during this time. Like I said earlier, I have a hard time accepting help, but my hands were tied, so I have reluctantly accepted it. I am so grateful for the many play dates and wonderful meals that have been brought. The baby dropped two weeks before the c-section date and I started experiencing sharp pains. We wen to the hospital again and they gave me pain meds. Before I even walked out the hospital doors, I had to stagger back up stairs. I was so nauseous and felt drunk or high. I could hardly walk and probably looked drunk trying to do so. When I made it up stairs I asked the nurse if it was normal and she said sometimes it goes to my head...didn't understand that, but then I needed a bathroom where I threw up. She got me a wheelchair and put me back in my room until someone could wheel me downstairs. I was on the phone with my mom when all this happened so she called my step-dad Dan and he was literally two minutes away. He stayed with me until Daniel could make it back up stairs. The nurse said I would be fine if I ate something and I went home. I could barely move and was very loopy. I just made it into my driveway and had to throw up again. I kept trying to eat, but it would always come back up. I slowly driffted off into crazy halucinating loopy comatose state. The next two days I felt like I was hit by a truck. I guess the meds they gave me have a small chance of reacting the way they did and I was the lucky winner of that giveaway. I have not been back to the OB floor since and told my self I wouldn't unless my water broke. So that was two weeks ago and now I have made it. I really thought I would have gone earlier, but this baby has a mind of it's own.

This morning I have a pre-registration, whatever that means and tomorrow Daniel and I will go tot the hospital at 5am to prepare for a 7am surgery. I was really prepared to go early so to make it this far seemed like a huge feat. especially with all the complications. At the beginning of this week my mom and I started to nest by cleaning the house top to bottom. More so nesting on my part and my poor mom was just here to help. I bet she could sleep for a week! Now that everything is clean and organized and ready for our little one, I almost wish I had more time. Maybe it is because I know of the sleep deprivation coming, or maybe it is because of the gaping hole they will cut into my belly. I still don't remember everything from the first time. I guess that why practice makes perfect. I had a dream that this baby was toe headed with red freckles. I guess we will find out soon enough.

Ben is not a cuddly boy and lately I think he knows something is changing because he loves to snuggle and give hugs and kisses. I have really enjoyed this close time with him. I hope he will transition easily with the new baby. I think the bed rest has helped prepare him and me for this. I love him so much and am excited to meet and create such a bond with a new baby.

Poor Daniel has gone through a lot this time too. He is the worrier and I think I gave him an ulcer this time around. He has been such a great support and help. Ben and him have grown closer and I am very grateful for their special bond. Thank you for everyone who has helped me in this adventure!

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Benjamins 2 year photo shoot

Each year I take Ben out and do a photo shoot for his birthday. This year I tried one day and it was so unbearable hot and Ben was miserable. So I tried again and magic happened. He is so cute to photograph and so photogenic. I took him down to the landing and had him dress very snazzy. We walked around in the early morning and just had a blast! Let me know which ones are your favorites!
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Sunday, September 5, 2010

Glub, Dibble, Splash! Your invited to Ben's 2nd Birthday Bash!

Since my due date is Ben's second birthday, I decided to have it a month early so I don't have to worry about the stress of a new baby and a birthday party. The date was set for August 28th and it was a pool party at my in laws swimming pool. Ben just LOVES to swim, so I thought it was appropriate to have a pool party.
Grandpa Mark & Grandma Dee

I created this super cute fish for his theme and used it everywhere. I made an e-vite for those who wouldn't be making it due to living out of state. The hand delivered invitations were the fish attached to a beach ball that was rolled up.We decided to have a lunch of sandwiches, jello, veggies, fanta soda, and cupcakes. I found this adorable serving trays and such at the dollar store on sale. My mom helped me make the cupcakes and her and my aunt Celeen frosted them to look like water. I designed the fish to be put on top of the cupcakes. I also made cupcake stands out of candle sticks and plates.
Brittany & Grandma Guenin

Food table
Cupcakes

The party started at 11 am and people started to arrive right away. Ben's best friend from church, Marley Geisey, was the first to arrive. Ben was so excited to have a friend to swim with! The guests were greeted with a gift table and a sign in sheet with Ben's 2nd bday photo. I have the guests sign a sheet of paper which later is put into Ben's scrapbook so he can remember who attended his parties.Gift & sign in table

Everyone swam for about an hour and we brought out the food. We ate and then more swimming. Ben has this little life jacket that lets him swim with out any help. He had a blast. After a while we brought out the cupcakes and gifts. I found this adorable crown that said "Happy Birthday" and Ben actually kept it on the whole time. He didn't know how to blow the candle out, so he had a little help from mommy.Singing Happy BirthdayEnjoying his Cupcake

Then he started the gift opening. The little kids loved this and helped him with the paper. He received so many wonderful gifts and he wanted to open and play with them right then! Daniel and I gave him a barnyard puzzle that made animal sounds, a train puzzle with the alphabet and animals, a horsey bank-he LOVES horses, and of course a build-a-bear. He chose a panda this year. He had a hard choice between the panda and a horse. We named the new addition Ping! I also made him a little kitchen out of an old nightstand and some new wood. He loves to cook too!Kitchen Britt built
Playing with felt food Britt madeTrying to open gifts right now!
We stayed and swam until 5pm. Ben swam the WHOLE time! It was probably 5-6 hours! He had sunscreen on, but because he was swimming so long, and I forgot to reapply, he got a little sunburn on his back and cheeks. He crashed on the way home. He slept for an hour and then was up for a few more hours before bedtime. He was so worn out!

The next few days Ben would come to me and say "back hurt". I felt so bad!

I am so glad the party went so well. I just love throwing parties!

Thank you to everyone who came and gave gifts. Benjamin loved everyone and is still so excited to play with them every morning!Aunt Aliona & Alexa

Uncle dallanCousin SilasSlide!
Aliona, Uncle Chase, Alexa, Cousin Aaron, Tucker (part of his head), Papa's backMarley, Candy, Brittany
Ben eating his lunch
Jessika, Grandma Dee & Cousin Tyler
Aunt Michelle & Tyler
Michelle & Nathan

Ben and his rosey cheeks
video